A bump in the road. I could not get myself to write.
Part of it was a mental block, a lack of material, clogged up insides.
However, that wasn’t all of it. I’ve been physically and emotionally exhausted for so long that I just couldn’t do it. The very thought of trying just made me ready to nap at odd hours.
I will not berate myself. I refuse to view this a failure. 153 days without a break is an achievement. Far more writing than the many years previous to my life as a student. I begin again, but I will not set back the clock to 1. I will treat this as a vacation, a rest, a chance to recoup and find my voice again. My next post will be moving forward.
I did have a few moments of inspiration this week, however, they were always at times when I couldn’t actually stop and write. For instance, earlier today I was driving on the Garden State Parkway with passengers in the car. I thought about calling myself and leaving a message with the lines of verse that popped into my head.
I was overcome with embarrassment at the thought of it. Sometimes the verses come out all tangled and I need to spend hours untangling. I found myself quiet and frozen, losing myself in the drive and the music instead.
It is in moments like this that I hope my subconscious is actively working on the words for me. Untangling them slowly and surely deep inside my mind. Hoping that something down the line will trigger the words to pour forth complete and whole.
I’ll cross my fingers and hope that is the case with this set of lines floating somewhere between the highway and my living room floor.
I’ll begin again and push forward.
Photo prompts are by me and for me.
205 Days to go.
© Randi Sumner