It is only Thursday night and the week already feels incredibly long. . .  I took a moment to breathe deep and recognized that it isn’t that the weekend *feels* long, it’s that it has been long! It’s been a days of early morning meetings with the middle east and late night calls with the far east.

I love that my job has the capacity to influence and connect technology leaders from across the globe. I love that I get to tap into my strengths. However, there are moments when I miss the relative ease of driving strategy for an organization with a region all in the same time zone. I slept more hours.

Everything in life has a bit of give and take. I think one of the tricks to achieving contentment or happiness is figuring out which of the give and takes work best for us as individuals. And, recognizing that it isn’t a static thing.

The ebb and flow of life that made me happy in my early 20s isn’t exactly the same give and take that soothes my soul in my late 40s.

As our household begins it’s back to school journey and the summer begins to draw to a close, I can’t help become a bit pensive wondering what this year will have in store and how much will change. How that give and take balance is likely to see-saw more than a bit.

Not only will I turn 50 in 2020, but my two youngest will turn 18 and graduate High School. My eldest is considering finishing undergraduate studies by December, rather than slowing it down to the full four years. It’s going to be an eventful year.

As we near September and the academic calendar turns, the import of the coming year weighs me down a bit.

I am a strategic planner by trade. My worklife bread and butter is driven by problem solving and long-term thinking. My instinct is to go beyond the immediate next, to try and push to the step after and the one after that. This is where I’ve trained my brain to go in order to be successful in my field.  I find myself having to reign that in at home.

My About-To-Be-Senior kids need to focus on the single next because, for them, focusing on the “big plan” or the 3-5 years of nexts can be daunting. It can stress them out to the point of the personal tower of hope inside them collapsing from the weight of all those nexts.

This is a parenting trial for me. Reigning in that which I spend hours attempting to hone is the give and take that will be needed to help my kids through this next year. It will make them happier. Which in turn, will make me happier.

It will be what it will be.

It will not easy.

#OTR50
201 Days to go.

© Randi Sumner